The white hippo in the shipping ministry and more

Now, how can we describe another project that is also horrendously costly and ludicrously large, but floats on water? It's a dream-come-true project, a gargantuan cargo ship to be precise, that the ministry of shipping is hell-bent on buying with an astronomical sum. Well, since it's a water-based project we may compare it with a hippopotamus because of its size. We may even baptize the ship with the name "white hippopotamus." Befitting, isn't it?

It also costs a good amount of money. But money is of no concern to the shipping minister of this super-rich country called Golden Bengal. We heard that he felt nearly affronted when someone quoted the price of the ship at only Tk. 91 crore! What! Such a paltry sum! Being a high and mighty minister of a rich country, could he, or should he, sign a cheque for such a meagre amount? No way, sir. You have to understand his position!

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Therefore, please enhance the price, escalate the cost, before minister sahib comes to office this morning. How much is it now? Tk. 130 crore? Good. There is a musical ring in the amount. You see, now it will take up the entire space on the cheque. Taka one hundred and thirty crore only. Hmmm … now it sounds real good. Golden Bengal is a rich country, isn't it?

But, we are worried, very worried indeed, to hear that some spoilsports in the related parliamentary committee are not liking this extremely poverty-alleviating and poor-friendly project of the ministry of shipping. They are overtly jealous of the highly efficient minister and the way he is steering the ministry through troubled waters. These ungrateful people want to complain about his "doings" to the prime minister of the country. What a preposterous proposition!

Shouldn't ministers enjoy total impunity while spending public money the way they want to in this country? It's a free-for-all country, isn't it? Then why should others interfere in their business? These jealous people termed the minister's decision to go for the expensive ship unilateral and rigid. Funny indeed. He is the one and only minister of the ministry concerned. Therefore, who else but he has the right to play around with the price before signing the contract? There is no room for others to poke their dirty nose in the affair.

And if the minister feels physically unwell minutes before a meeting of the committee on the issue then why should the members become so critical about it? Can't someone fall ill before important meetings? And the audacity of the members of the committee did not end there! They even hinted at referring the case to the Anti-Corruption Commission! Well, let's wait and see what develops in Golden Bengal.

There is a never-ending flow of weird tales from that country. Last week this particular news of somewhat grave nature hit the headlines of newspapers of Golden Bengal. In fact, it's about real graves and a graveyard. Believe it or not, a part of that ancient graveyard has been hijacked by a high and mighty man and his wife to make some "windfall" profit by creating a road across and over the sacred bones of their sleeping ancestors.

Some readers found the news report uncanny and did not want to read the entire story. We believe "desecration" is a word not to be found in those people's dictionary. The contractors did not stop their road construction work even after a stop order was issued from some higher authorities. It is being whispered around that the man has useful connections with a prince living in the legendary "Windy Castle" in that country.

So what do people do? They usually do the right thing. You see, collectively people always do positive things, though individually some of them may do bad things. Therefore, when the workers did not stop the construction work even after a lot of pleading, some religious-minded people destroyed the foundation pillars with their bare hands on Friday last. They could not allow defilement of the graves of their near and dear ones by some controversial people who became too greedy to make money.

The high quality dramas at the Election Commission of Golden Bengal continue to be staged every day, now behind newly-erected iron fencing to protect the performers from the cheering audience. Drama critics and media throng the place from dawn to dusk for a glimpse of the performers and to collect the latest news about the new productions.

The performers have already attained the status of celebrities. They are now expecting calls from foreign countries to stage their shows. By now the EC has become as famous as the legendary "Globe Theatre" of London from the Shakespearian era. The name of the latest drama they have staged is: "To go door to door or not to go, that is the question." We heard that it's a powerful drama and tickets are difficult to come by these days. So one has to watch it on television.

Shahnoor Wahid is a Senior Assistant Editor of The Daily Star.